Porn consumers and cam customers may experience a plethora of emotions as a result of indulging in their sexual kinks and desires. This range of emotions may include guilt, which may then cause buyer’s remorse.
When you run a business — and camming as well as content production are a business — it is common to want to provide the best product, service and experience for those seeking you out, as well as cultivate customer retention. When a customer suddenly vanishes without any signs or communication, understandably, this may reduce your confidence in your business.
Generally though, it’s not you or your service. It’s them.
Before you fault yourself, there are some things to consider about customers and the psychology behind purchasing goods and services — especially within the context of webcam.
They may feel like they are cheating on their significant other
While it is simply online chatting and talking, it is common for spouses to view this type of interaction as “cheating.” Whether their spouse knows or is in the dark about their communications with you, the feeling of guilt can resonate within and force them to disconnect. Fear that their partner may find out can also be a cause for sudden disappearing acts.
Society tells them what they are doing is wrong
We know, as sex workers, the negative perception and judgment that society places on us and those who engage with us. Whether they are spending money or not doesn’t play a part in this guilt ridden state. When someone finds out, or just that feeling that someone could potentially find out about their online “indiscretions,” they may feel ashamed and guilty, which may cause them to retreat to a “safe zone.”
Financial hardships can be a factor
It happens to the best of us and being in a position to spend freely doesn’t last forever. It’s very often that a customer can no longer afford or justify spending the money they’d like to on porn, cams or cam models. It can be embarrassing to admit that they don’t have the access to funds to pay you, therefore it is easier to just disappear.
Schedule conflicts may come up
Not communicating with you or spending money on you can simply be a scheduling conflict. Either you are live when they are unable to visit you, or you are logged off when they can find the time. Whatever the case, scheduling can be an issue. Your customers get busy and caught up with life, so don’t think it’s personal if they can’t find time to visit your room.
Commitment issues are real
We all know that commitment is difficult for many in IRL relationships. The same rings true for camming and porn. Customers want variety and will be generous today — then on to someone else tomorrow. Be grateful for what you are able to receive, and never count on a long stay. If they turn into a long lasting generous customer, you will be pleasantly surprised!
Speaking of “real,” reality often bites
A fan or customer can become bitter when they realize that you are just a fantasy. When the reality hits for them that you are not an easily attainable item and the fantasy fades into a bitter reality, disconnection seems the most logical solution.
Truth: Some people are immature
Hearing the word “no” for many can be a hard pill to swallow. Not being mature enough to accept that they don’t own you when they spend money on you can be indicative of immaturity. And an immature customer may disappear.
Instant gratification and disposable entertainment
This is a business for us and we’re in it for the long haul, but for many it’s just a means to achieve a quick release and move on. Once a customer has received what they want, they may quickly exit stage left and vanish.
Immaturity’s cousin, Insecurity
Not feeling secure can have a fan or customer not feeling worthy enough to keep your attention or occupy your time. Insecurities often lead to negative thoughts and feelings. These feeling may have no truth to them, but if the customer has manifested this version of their reality, it’s out of your control. Rather than expose how they feel about themselves, it’s easier just to remove themselves from the equation.
You can be honest with your customers, up front and spelling everything out to the T. When a fan gets something in his or her mind, however, and aren’t feeling that their expectations are being met, this can be another reason for sudden disappearance.
Everyone likes a good deal. In our industry, the same rings true for the buyer who searches and searches for the cheapest price for what they want. It’s not that they don’t feel you are worth what you charge. It’s just that they aren’t going to give up off their hard earned coins until they find what they feels is the best bargain. If the “discount” pops up elsewhere, they may disappear.
Cam feels too much like business
If you are like me, you are a business person first. Everything is about business, though you do have to give a little to get a little from time to time. Often, customers are turned off by the feeling of your interaction being a business transaction rather than mutual interest.
The best advice I can give for how you approach your cam customers and porn buyers is to never expect them to keep buying and spending. Be pleasantly surprised if they do stay a long time, continuing to spoil you and purchase your content and cam shows — but never assume it will last for ever and don’t take it personally when it doesn’t.
Refer to the above possibilities before you guilt yourself about losing a customer. Be they long term or a brief encounter, chances are it really is them (not you). Happy camming!
Just too fucking cool for clothes pic.twitter.com/8rr1BTsepn
— ?QueenofBBW.com (@PlatinumPuzzy1) June 11, 2019
Kari “Platinum Puzzy” Anthony is an events trailblazer in the adult industry community. She created and organized BBWFANFEST, the first BBW niche trade and awards show recognizing plus size performers, and BBWCAMHOUSE — the first live 24-hour voyeur house filled with curvy adult stars, cam performers, dancers and more. Email her at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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