By Chloe ChocolateTreatXO
One of my favorite things about being a sex worker is that I control my schedule. I can do whatever I want, whenever I want. How amazing is that? As a phone sex operator (PSO) and erotic MP3 creator, I get to work from home. I don’t have to check in with anyone, I don’t clock in or out and if I want an off day, I can take it.
While this is the most appealing thing about being a sex worker, I’ve found that this freedom came with an emotional price. Time can go by so quick that when you finally look up, you realize it’s Saturday and all you did was talk about cocks and nut all week. Sometimes, we get in a zone where we’re working all the time and the money is good — so much so that when we interact with people we can’t help but think of the money we lose when we’re with them.
If you haven’t been guilty of this, I’m glad you were able to find a groove for you that works. That’s not the case for everyone though.
So, what can sex worker do to avoid the isolation trap? This selection of tips and tricks is for individuals that have fallen into their own isolation trap. The solutions are crazy easy to implement, it’s really just a matter of convincing yourself to do them.
Tip #1 — Work outside of the home
Okay, you can’t take calls or record sexy clips outside from your home in front of nonconsenting individuals. The whole point of working outside of your normal space is to get some fresh air and be in a different atmosphere. If you have some work you can do in public, I recommend you give it a shot.
Go to your local coffee shop, your favorite breakfast or lunch spot and work on your product descriptions, blog posts, scheduling social media posts or even editing audio clips (with headphones, of course) in an open space. As long as no one can see anything x-rated, it’s all good. You get to exist around other humans and still get your work done. That’s a win-win in my book.
Tip #2 — Go to a fitness class
I’m not saying you have to do anything crazy fancy, but when I started to realize I was falling into a depressive episode due to being alone, I started taking classes.
I’ve been wanting to get fitter for a while now, so it was a great solution. You don’t have to go to a fitness class just to lose weight though. I love being around the other women in my classes and hearing their stories, even though I rarely say anything. I love the energy I’m able to take in while I’m around them. Also, all that jumping and dancing around gets your blood pumping. At the end of your class, you’ll feel so good for having to accomplished something, even if you half-assed the class.
Tip #3 — Set weekly reminders on your phone to call your loved ones
I can easily let weeks go by without talking to my family or friends. I’ve already put our group chats on “Do Not Disturb,” and I’ll find myself playing catch-up on what’s going on in everyone’s lives.
After hearing my dad tell me for the millionth time he wants to know I’m doing okay, I set a reminder and an alarm on my phone to remind myself to do my weekly check in calls with everyone. Does that seem a bit extreme? Maybe, but I need that alarm to make me remember to stay connected to those who are important to me.
I’m introverted and I also have to manage a few health issues, so it’s nothing for me to stay to myself. When thoughts like that pop up, I have to check myself and take my own desires out of the equation. There are people in your life that want to connect with you and care for you. Give them the time they need to know you feel the same about them.
Tip #4 — Get a pet or volunteer at an animal shelter
If you love animals and it’s feasible, get a fur or feather baby.
I have no idea why this always pops in my mind, but whenever I’m feeling really really low, I always think about how I just want to be around dogs. Their energy is so amazing and I don’t care how upset or lonely you feel — your pet will always pull you out of a funk.
If you have a dog, take them for a quick walk when you have a break for yourself. Walk around your neighborhood and get some air. Have a bird or a cat? Put them on a leash and take them for walk too if they’ll corporate. If not, then just enjoy some quick unplugged time with them to bond and get a boost of energy.
If you’re like me and you have yet to get an animal, volunteering at your local shelter is pretty fun. I love to play with the puppies after I help with any cleaning or feeding. Currently, I’m on the search for a Samoyed so I can name him “Ice Bear” and have him with me at all times.
Here’s a super sweet Samoyed from Insta. Ice Bear seems like the perfect name for a beautiful friend who looks similar to this baby!
Tip #5 — Take yourself on a date at least once a month
I’m single, and my schedule is the complete opposite of my friends’ schedules. While we get together at least once a month, I take myself out at least once a month on an off day.
I’ll put on cute human clothes, put on makeup and do all the things I use to do when I worked a 9-to-5. Then I’ll find an activity to do, whether it’s checking out an exhibit at one of the local museums, trying a new restaurant or just going to the mall when it’s not super crowded. I always meet new people.
While I’m not necessarily trying to make new friends or place some kind of expectation on those interactions, it feels good just to know that I’m still able to hold a convo with someone, even if I feel weird. I know small talk can sometimes feel like a waste of time, but when you have limited interactions with people, appreciate that short connection you made with the old lady in the lingerie section that doesn’t understand why Spanx are so expensive now. Who knows — one day you might be her.
Isolation is a real thing and if you don’t check it, you will burn yourself and find that you need to take a few weeks or even an entire month off just to recoup your energy. Your mental and emotional health matters. It’s worth the time and energy you expend.
I hope that one of my tips will be of use to you. Even if you don’t currently feel isolate, these ideas are good preventative measures. If this helped you and you and want to connect, you can find me on Twitter at @Chloexo_treat!
Background banner image via Marina Shatskih from Pexels.